For most of my life, I lived on autopilot. I was constantly achieving, constantly doing — but rarely feeling. I didn’t even realize I was emotionally disconnected. I just thought I was “handling business,” like I always had.

I grew up in an environment where emotional expression and loving vulnerability weren’t the norm. So I learned early on to armor up. When I graduated from college, I went straight into being a police officer in the streets of Detroit. A woman. In uniform. In a space where there was no room for softness. No time to be emotional. No space to be feminine. Vulnerability wasn’t just uncomfortable — it felt dangerous. And I needed my partners to trust that I’d have their back. So I buried any part of me that didn’t look like strength.

That pattern followed me through life. After two failed marriages — no feelings. Family losses — no grief. I kept moving. Kept getting things done. And for a long time, I didn’t think anything was wrong. I was proud of who I was. Three degrees. A successful law firm. A passport full of stamps. Close relationships with family and friends. I bought what I wanted, when I wanted. On paper, life was good.

And yet, deep down, something was missing.

It was the emotional connection — to myself, to others, to life. I wasn’t truly living. I wasn’t allowing myself to feel love deeply, to experience joy fully, to be at peace.

It wasn’t until I spent five years on an island, surrounded by a community of beautiful, spiritually grounded women who embraced me without needing me to be “strong,” that I started to understand what I had been missing. They loved me like family — without conditions, without expectations. And for the first time, I felt safe enough to start softening. To be vulnerable. To feel.

That’s when the real work began — the inner work.

I started going inward. Healing traumas I didn’t even know I had. Forgiving myself. Learning to accept myself. Learning to trust my feminine energy, not suppress it. I began to experience emotions I had long buried — and with them, I discovered peace, joy, love, and freedom.

I know what it’s like to feel numb. To look like you have it all together but feel disconnected inside. I also know the power of choosing a different way. I’ve done the work. I continue to do the work. And now, I have the tools, the community, and the wisdom to help other women do the same.